Saturday, September 16, 2006

The REAL Reason Harold is Helping Jake...

When you look at the abysmal lack of qualifications Jake Ford has for holding office, you can only ask “Why? What did we ever do to the Ford family that we deserve this albatross around our neck?”

Here’s the answer: Nothing. Much like when he’s voting in the House of Representatives, Harold Ford Jr. hasn’t even thought about the needs of the hardworking people of this district.

That’s not what it’s all about.

Assume for a moment that you have a brother like Jake. Even with the considerable wealth and clout that the family carries, they still couldn’t find a private school willing to sell this guy a diploma.

He’s got to have a job, or he’s going to spend his entire life living in your basement. So you put him to work in the family business, the Harold Ford Group lobbying firm.

But even that isn’t much of an improvement. He’s not the sharpest tool in the shed, so at some point in his unaccomplished career, that salary is tantamount to giving him an allowance.

How do you get this leech off of the family dole?

It’s “Welfare-to-Work” time.

Harold Ford Jr. is supporting his brother simply because he’s tired of supporting his brother. This moves him off of the Harold Ford Sr.-administered welfare and into a job where it’s forgivable (Perhaps even preferable, if you’re a Republican) to be as dumb as a box of rocks.

Don’t knock it. It worked wonders when George Bush Sr. was trying to find a job for his two little dullards.

This isn’t about hanging an albatross around our necks--- It’s a desperation move to remove one from their own.

So forget the well-educated, accomplished legislator running against him. While that guy was pushing for legislation that sends kids to college on the house, GED Jake was humiliating the family in a wrestling ring. While the well-educated, accomplished legislator was building a voting record that any state senator can be proud of, GED Jake was getting thrown out of school after school.

Isn’t that why we exist? To relieve the burdens of the Ford family? To fork over our hard-earned money in exchange for representation by someone I can only generously call a buffoon?

It’s Congress or bagging groceries. Frankly, I don’t think he could hold the grocery job very long.

If they want this withered fruit of the family loom to get a check issued by the federal government every month, they should encourage him to apply for welfare.

5 comments:

Blinders Off said...

While I was watching the response, HFJ gave Mike Matthews about Corker’s campaign ad against him. Did HFJ appear out of character…he looked agitated and stressed? He is not that way when he is giving an interview or response to a national media outlet. Do you believe his character change has more to do with his brother than the Corker ads? I think so because, HFJ had to know Corker was going to push hard against him as he did against his Republican opponents in the primary.

Freedonian said...

Sorry I just now saw this.

To be honest, I've heard that's much closer to the real Harold than the genial fellow we usually see when the cameras are on. It's not so much "out of character" as it's the real Harold shining through.

mountainview said...

Well, as one who's taken a couple of irate calls from Junior, I can confirm he is one high-strung dude, with a hair-trigger temper and a penchant for taking political criticism quite personally. And he's chased more staffers than anyone else north of Katherine Harris.

mountainview said...

That's chased "off" more staffers, etc.

Freedonian said...

Chased, chased off... Either way, it squares with some of what I've heard, Mountain View.