Wednesday, May 16, 2007

But... But... Who Will Protect Our Children From Gay Teletubbies Now???

As you no doubt have heard, Jerry Falwell died yesterday.

I come to bury the idiot, not to praise him.

Throughout his life, he had an unblemished record for being on the absolute wrong side of any given issue. Any time he was given half a chance, he would preach that Jesus wants you to "love they neighbor"--- At least as long as it was the neighbor in the next pew.

“If Chief Justice Warren and his associates had known God's word and had desired to do the Lord's will, I am quite confident that the 1954 decision [Brown v. Board of Education] would never have been made…. The facilities should be separate. When God has drawn a line of distinction, we should not attempt to cross that line.”

That stance should hardly have been a surprise. We're still talking about the man who regularly featured Lester Maddox and George Wallace on his "Old-Time Gospel Hour" to spread their "Christian message. He's the same guy that constantly referred to the Civil Rights Movement as the "Civil Wrongs Movement" (Clever one he was, eh?).

In his 1965 sermon called "Ministers and Marches", he admonished Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and James Farmer for supporting communism (Which, in that day as now, was fatass white guy-speak for equal rights) before adding "Preachers are not called to be politicians, but to be soul winners."

Of course, that was a few years before he said "In recent months, God has been calling me to do more than just preach--He has called me to take action. I have a divine mandate to go right into the halls of Congress and fight for laws that will save America."

In other words--- Ministers getting involved in the fight against subjugation of black people = BAD. Ministers helping rightwing politicians get elected = GOOD. Got it.

Lest anyone think he left racism behind once the Civil Rights Act became law, he travelled to South Africa to support the Botha (Apartheid) regime, and came back encouraging white Christians to purchase Krugerrands to bolster South Africa's failing government, called Nelson Mandela "pro-terrorist", and decided that he, a white American, knew what was in the interest of black South Africans better than the black South Africans did by declaring Archbishop Desmond Tutu a "phony" who "misrepresented the black people of South Africa".

Because, you know, a supporter of Lester Maddox and George Wallace has the best interests of black people at heart.

After his contributions dropped off by $500,000 in the two weeks following the South Africa debacle, he decided to steer clear of race politics for a new obsession---

Butt sex.

"The sexual preference of Tinky Winky..." Oh hell, I can't even type with a straight face any diatribe that starts with "The sexual preference of Tinky Winky". And certainly, everyone remembers Falwell and the Beavis to his Butthead, Pat Robertson, lamenting that 9/11 was the fault of pagans, abortionists, feminists, gays and lesbians, the ACLU, People For the American Way, and secularists.

One thing that he said in the middle of that diatribe was quite accurate, but not for the reason he thought it was.

"God will not be mocked".

So, who was it that really mocked God? The black Americans that demanded equal rights under law and the right to vote? Black South Africans that asked for the right to not be colonized into minority rule? The gays who walk among us every day of their lives as God made them?

Or some buffoon that never found a brand of bigotry he couldn't get behind?

Rest in peace, Falwell. I hope when you reach your final destination (I wouldn't lay odds on you going to heaven), that you're treated just as you demanded the powerless here on Earth be treated.

Also see:
Jerry Falwell's Greatest Zits
On the Passing of Jerry Falwell
Falwelling Down


LeftWingCracker said...

Damn, and I thought I smacked him down, this on target.

Photoshop is a beautiful thing, eh?

Anonymous said...

And what will they say of you two miscreants when you finally die? They sure knew their obscenities. Yeah, they were great at talking, but never DID anything.

LeftWingCracker said...

yet another argument against anonymous posting....

No guts, no glory, schmuck!

Freedonian said...

Brother Cracker,

PhotoShop? I didn't zphotoshop that! ;) Mr. Winky set them up on a blind date which is being filmed for a new reality show, I just screen capped it.

Freedonian said...


You're right. I feel liks such an underachiever! I mean, by the time he was my age, Falwell had already spoken out strongly against civil rights for blacks and even their very right to send their children to the same school as ours. He had already shilled for Lester Maddox and George Wallace.

And by the time he was Cracker's age, he had already stuck up for the Botha government in South Africa and asked white Christians to buy Krugerrands to offset the economic boycott of South Africa's apartheid government.

When we die, we'll certainly have done less damage than that jackass Falwell tried to do.

PeskyFly said...

For not the last time--- We do not traffic in obscinities, or profanity, we cuss. We cuss because of all the obscinity and profanity.

Something tells me a man's actions and goals mean more than the color of his language.

At least we're not anonymous pissant cowards standing up for a hatemonger.

Edward Frick said...

Gee, anonymous, you certainly do get around. Who knew cringing, cowardly little right-wing blog trolls had such mobility.

The Christian Progressive Liberal said...

My, my, can anyone think of anything that Jerry Falwell did in the name of Jesus? Cause everything he did and claimed to do in the name of Jesus basically set off my bullshit detector and I have my Ph.D in Bullshitology.

And I say that as the Christian Progressive Liberal, who is more Christian than Jerry Falwell never imagined himself to be, cause if he did, there's no way in hell he could espouse God endorsing separation of anything because it would violate the one Bible verse that contradicted everything Falwell stood for:

"For there is no respect of persons with God." (Romans 2;11)

Guess that was among any Biblical verse that called for him to love thy neighbor as himself, huh? Couldn't do it if the "neighbor" was African-American, Latino, Asian, Native American, or hell, even good ol' Caucasian boys who knew what they phrase actually meant and saw the content of a person's character, right?

Even George Wallace repented and asked Blacks in 'Bama to forgive him for his bigotry (especially since he was crippled and no one else would take care of him except African-Americans).

Falwell couldn't even do that. So, thanks, Freedonian, for allowing me to speak my piece after your eloquent obituary that I wished I'd thought of it - cause it's very fitting and quite touching...for those of us who were Falwell's victims.

Freedonian said...

Christian Progressive Liberal,

I'm honored that you liked what I wrote. And I'm grateful for the superb comment you posted.

I have no doubt in my mind that you're more of a Christian than Falwell. There are atheists that live up to Christian ideals better than Falwell did. When I was an atheist, I still probably lived a great deal closer to the ideals set forth by Jesus than Falwell ever did.

You and I both understand something that Falwell did not--- We realize that Christ cares how we treat our fellow man.

He will reply, "I tell you the truth, whatever you did not do for one of the least among you, you did not do for me." Matthew 25:45

What did Falwell do for the powerless among him? He did his best to keep them powerless. Every time he spoke, he made a calculated decision to disregard the disenfranchised so that he could appeal to the enfranchised, and then the "angry white man" that doesn't understand the difference between rights and privilege. He had a Southern Strategy all his own.